Val and Dana Hartong (both are now in the Presence of the Lord Jesus Christ) asked us to speak at their church in 1997. Below is what Val wrote into a booklet to share for their own marriage ministry....

Les and Cindy Snyder spoke at a marriage seminar at New Hope Church, Sturgis, Michigan, April 12, 1997. Their testimony was such a blessing to everyone that we decided to print it.  We know it will give hope to many standers who will relate to it.  The Lord instructed Cindy, from the beginning, to involve their children, Cathy and Lathan, in this walk.  HE would teach them spiritual warfare first-hand.  They would have the foundation of their Christian walk established by seeing the Glory of God repair the breach that looked impossible to repair, and the paths restored that seemed impossible to ever walk upon again.

 Isaiah 58:12 - "And they that shall be of thee shall build the old waste places: thou shalt raise up the foundations of many generations; and thou shalt be called, The repairer of the breach, The restorer of paths to dwell in."

THE VALLEY

Les began the testimony.  I was the one who took off.  We were married in 1979 and have two kids. Cindy and I got saved in 1985, and you would think that all of our problems would be over, and we would have a fine Christian marriage.  But in 1990, I got other ideas and decided I didn't want to be married anymore or have any responsibility for my kids.  I didn't think that I loved Cindy, and I told her that I wanted a divorce. Cindy has always been very physical in our relationship, but something came over me and I didn't want Cindy anymore.  She was busy as the president of the American Family Association in our county.  She was always busy doing something or going someplace.  I told myself that Cindy didn't need me, and that I needed someone who did.  I didn't start out to find someone else, but at the place where I worked there was a woman who seemed to be helpless and needed someone to take care of her.  That's how I got on the road to adultery.

It's true what Les just said.  When I got saved in 1985, I poured myself into working for the Kingdom of God because of loving Jesus so much.  I was out there working for the Lord, home-schooling our kids, which we still do.  On the weekends, I was off with Operation Rescue, or at a speaking engagement for A.F.A., or busy in the church.  As far as I knew, we had a wonderful marriage.  We didn't argue, we didn't

fight, and I trusted Les.  When we first started through the valley, people would ask me, "Is there someone else?"  I would answer adamantly, "NO WAY!! You don't know my husband. There's NO WAY that Les would do that.  He's NOT like that!!"  I knew, that I knew, that I knew, that there was NOT someone else.

On May 30, 1990, Les came home, crawled into bed and said, "I WANT A DIVORCE."I looked into his eyes and saw such hatred that I knew he wasn't kidding.  He did not look like my Les.  The valley lasted for about a year and a half, and he didn't look like my Les during that entire time. His eyes were dark; He got into  wearing designer clothing; He started working out and lost a lot of weight; He got a different hairstyle and he became a person that I didn't even know.  He told me, what will sound familiar to thousands of women who have heard these same words from their husbands, "I DON'T LOVE YOU; I HAVE NEVER LOVED YOU; WE WERE TOO YOUNG WHEN WE GOT MARRIED; WE WERE NEVER SUPPOSED TO GET MARRIED."  I asked him, "What about the kids?"  His answer was cold, hard, and uncaring; "YOU SHELTER THEM TOO MUCH!! KIDS ALL OVER THE WORLD GO THROUGH THIS AND HANDLE IT.  OURS WILL TOO!!"

I went upstairs, got on the phone and called my mom, my sisters, and my pastor, and asked for prayer.  I asked them to pray that God would me the gift of faith to believe for my marriage.  AND GOD DID!!!

From that time on, God would encourage me by saying to me, "I AM THE GOD OF ALL FLESH, IS THERE ANYTHING TOO HARD FOR ME? MY ARM IS NOT TOO SHORT TO SAVE OR MY EAR DEAF THAT I DO NOT HEAR!" I remember Him asking me, "ARE YOU GOING TO BELIEVE THE WORDS OF A MERE MAN, OR THE WORD OF ALMIGHTY GOD!!!"We are the ones who limit God! That day, May 30, 1990, I resigned from everything. The minute I knew Les was serious, NOTHING was important to me but my marriage. God burned into me, in a matter of seconds, what my priorities were: my husband and my children! He showed me that as I served my husband, I was serving Jesus Christ, as I loved my husband, I was loving Jesus Christ, because Les is my lord here on this earth. God was showing me that although it looked like Les was the one in the sin right now, HE had just as much work to do in ME!I didn't know whether the walk would take ten months or ten years, or whether there would be a "divorce" or not. I just knew that GOD WOULD BE FAITHFUL!!!

Now it seems ridiculous, Les continues, but even when I was committing adultery, I still called myself a Christian.  I even prayed, “Lord if this is not Your will, make something happen to make the ‘strange woman’ leave me”.  She didn't leave, so I said, “Hey, this is what I am going to do, since it must be okay with God”.

Cindy and I live out in the country on land that we bought from my mother and father-in-law, who live next door. At first I moved in with my brother, then I made Cindy and the kids leave our home and I moved into it with the strange woman. I told Cindy to get everything out of the house because anything left was going to get burned! I was starting a “new” life, WITHOUT Cindy, the kids, or “our” stuff! They moved in with Cindy’s parents and could look out the window and see me with the strange woman in the yard. I didn't know why I felt uncomfortable in my own home, until I found out later that Cindy had anointed our house, land and the four corners of our property and would walk, at night in her parent's lane, praying. The strange woman would get bored with me and feel uncomfortable in my home and take off. In fact, she left me three times, and three times I kicked my wife and children out of our home. All it took was one phone call from her, after she would leave, to get me back on her hook. She was like a magnet which I couldn't resist. We would get back together, and I would tell Cindy to get out of the house.

As these things were happening to Les, I cried out to the Lord.  I didn't know anything about "standing" for a marriage. The Word, the Bible, became a path and a guide to me. The Lord would tell me, throughout the valley, things that were going to happen before they even did. He told me, in Isaiah 57:18 &19, that HE WOULD HEAL LES. The day that I received the divorce papers was one of the hardest days of the valley. Throughout the valley, if I was not in the Word, if I did not have praise music - that was the WORD OF GOD - if I did not have the presence of God surrounding me, I felt like my heart was being put on hot coals or fire, and I couldn't pull it away. There was a real, physical pain, and IT HURT!! The moment I would get back into the presence of God, it was like soothing oil or ointment being poured over me. I could feel HISHEALING POWER!!! I had to come into the presence of God EVERY day and get rid of unforgiveness. I couldn't afford to harbor anger and let it pile up. Each day I had to allow the POWER OF FORGIVENESS in my life. I would cry out to the Lord and say, "I HATE HIM, I HATE HIM!" But, because of God's healing power, I would then find myself crying out “I LOVE HIM, I LOVE HIM!" God explained to me how I needed to watch my words. I needed to be kind and gentle.  When I would see Les, I was not to harp; I was not to manipulate. This was GOD'S BATTLE, and I was to back off, intercede and trust God to do the work in my husband. I knew that God was telling me that Les and I were truly ONE FLESH. One flesh cannot go in two directions at the same time! He told me to STAND, WATCH, and WAIT to see HIM draw Les back. I knew that if the divorce went through, in the natural realm, that God was telling me that those "papers" meant NOTHING! What God joined together would stay together, even if it didn't look like it!

The reason I always call the "other woman" the "strange woman" is because God told me to SPEAK FORTH HIS WORD and that is what the Word of God calls the adulterous woman. I never called her Les' girlfriend or Les' fling; It was ADULTERY WITH THE STRANGE WOMAN. As I spoke forth His Word, I was proclaiming the TRUTH and DEFEATING the enemy. The children and I lived next door with my parents, and I could see her drive in with MY garage door opener and pull into MY garage. I knew that she was doing dishes at MY kitchen sink, and was sleeping with MY husband in MY bed. So I would tattle on them to God! I'd say, "Father, You know what is happening down there. Look at them, Father." And as I would cry out to Him, He would heal me. Les told me later that the strange woman became very uncomfortable at our house.

I received Val and Dana's pamphlet, Through the Valley, from my sister-in-law. When I read it. I knew I wasn't loony. I knew I wasn't crazy. I realized that I wasn't alone, and I called and talked to Val. She encouraged me because God had spoken, to my heart, a lot of the same Scriptures that were in their pamphlet.

During this time of the valley, Les appeared to be "having a great time". He didn't need me, or want me. He acted as though he thought he could have any woman in the world that he wanted.  He was a macho acting, hard, mean, man. But from the beginning of the valley, the Lord told me, “DON'T GO BY WHAT YOU SEE WITH YOUR EYES OR HEAR WITH YOUR EARS!!!” It was at this time that God gave me a vision of what was really going on with Les. What the Lord showed me was Les, huddled up in a hump in a corner, bound with chains, whimpering and crying, with powers of darkness surrounding him, taunting him and torturing him. He was hurting and needed help - HE NEEDED SET FREE!! By our human, natural eyesight, Les was a man who didn't need anybody; A man who could take care of himself and who appeared to finally know what he wanted out of life. But GOD said otherwise!!

Like Les said, the kids and I were kicked out of our home three different times. I have had wonderful Christian people, and even pastors, tell me that, "Enough is enough”. "Three times of being kicked out of your own home is enough!" "You don't have to put up with being treated like that." "God has someone BETTER for you". "You deserve BETTER". "Why would you even WANT Les back?" But what God said was, "Cindy, how many times will I forgive you? Do I set a limit - three times and you're out? How far was I willing to go, and how much was I willing to do for YOU?" The Lord asked me…if I wasn't willing to intercede and fight spiritual warfare for Les, then who would? It was as if Les had gotten himself ensnared in a spider’s web, and we know that once a victim is caught in one it cannot free itself. BUT, someone could cut it free! The Lord taught me that intercessory prayer and standing in the authority of Jesus and on the Word of God was what was going to cut Les free from the snare that he was tangled in! God showed me that what the enemy meant for harm, God would use for good…HE’S IN THE SALVAGING BUSINESS! - Praise God! In the natural realm, Les’ and my marriage looked totally, hopelessly, destroyed. As I would try to share with others what was really going on and what God was doing, I could see the look in their eyes saying…”Poor Cindy, she just can’t face reality! Doesn’t she know how much Les doesn’t want her anymore?! Can’t she see how happy Les is now? Doesn’t she see how she is building up false hopes in the kids by not facing the truth? Doesn’t she realize how arrogant she sounds? She needs to just let go and get on with her life!” But God said that we were on the road of CONSTRUCTION and NOT the road of destruction! When a new, beautifully, smooth, paved highway is constructed, it first went through a time of appearing destroyed. It had to go through that phase to become the beautifully, completed road that now thousands are able to travel upon. We, as Christians, walk by FAITH not by sight, and God was teaching me this firsthand! I remember having to keep the Word of God - which is our shield and buckler - in front of me at all times because the enemy would come in and try to attack me with doubt. I would feel like I was sinking in a hopeless pit and the pain would become almost unbearable until I would SPEAK FORTH WHAT GOD HAD TOLD ME! His Word is what got me - us - through!

God said, "Cindy, if Les were sick and delirious in the hospital and you and the kids went to see him, and he yelled at you, ‘GET OUT, I DON'T NEED YOU, I DON'T LOVE YOU, I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN,’ would you believe him? Would you take the kids and leave and never go back? No, you would understand that, under the condition that he was in, he didn't know what he was saying. Now he is SPIRITUALLY sick and you are fighting for his ETERNAL healing, and his ETERNAL salvation is first and foremost. If I never promised you that your marriage would be healed, would you still intercede and lay your life down for him until he comes back to Me? Are you willing to do that to save his soul from eternal hell?" It wasn't easy, it was like a garden of Gethsemane. At that point there came a healing in me. I knew that there wasn't anything more important than to obey what the Father was asking of me. But it was hard; and yet He made it possible because He was my biggest cheerleader! Thank You, Jesus!  My mission was to be willing to serve Jesus NO MATTER WHAT and to fight spiritual warfare for Les' salvation. GOD had the PLAN. HE had the STRADGEY. It was no longer a battle for a marriage as much as it was for a husband’s soul!

I treated Cindy like dirt during the valley and she would turn the other cheek. I guess it was greed, but I thought that if I "got rid" of Cindy and the kids, I would have more money. BUT GOD HAD OTHER THINGS IN MIND! Every time that I thought that I would have some money for the strange woman and myself, something would happen! I wrecked my brother's motorcycle, my well went out, my lawnmower's motor burned up. When Cindy found out that I had NO FOOD in the house, and had only been eating plain spaghetti noodles, she brought me down some meatloaves and cheesecake. Cindy loved me even though I treated her like dirt. At one point, during the valley, I remember telling Cindy that I didn't know what REAL love was; I was learning, through Cindy. I had quit attending church and had reached a point where I didn't want anything to do with God. But God will reach down where we are. God used a secular movie to show me that NOBODY would love me like Cindy; NOBODY can raise our kids like Cindy and I, and we needed to be together as a family. I wouldn't go to God, so He came to me.

Cindy continued: During my valley experience, a friend sent me an excerpt from the book entitled Come Away My Beloved, by Francis J. Roberts. God used it to encourage me daily, along with His Word. As I would read, "Look not back. Keep thy face toward the sunrise, for He shall rise fresh daily in thy soul with healing in His wings," it was as if God was pouring cool, healing oil over my spirit. I knew God had a work to do in MY life and He was telling me the sooner you learn what I am trying to teach you, the sooner it will be over and Les will be healed.  I had to WAIT, TRUST, and BELIEVE and NOT look at what I saw with my eyes, or heard with my ears. I was to look through the Spirit's eyes, and stand on God's Word and see the VICTORY. I learned that what PEOPLE thought and said wasn't important, only what GOD said was! 

FAITH SEES the promise and SEES the mountain moved! Praise God, the divorce never went through and Les has been HEALED and SET FREE!!!